Attention.

There's times in our lives when you have that one person who you love and adore. You love spending time with them, you love talking to them, love making them laugh, love making them happy. You make them feel all these great emotions and in turn you feel all these great emotions. You're glowing, you're happy, you're loved, you're wanted.

But there's also times where you have that one person yet they don't want you like you want them. You find yourself doing the stupidest things to get their attention. You find yourself acting a certain way or saying certain things in hope you'll catch their attention. You make yourself pathetic in a way in hopes that you may get them for even a minute.

I hate when that happens. I hate when I feel unloved and unwanted and undesired and all I crave is them but I can't have them. I feel pathetic, I feel it when I make myself less than, I feel it when I'm acting in a way I hate. All for their attention and all to not get it.

Yes, you have to understand that they won't always give you attention. They might not always be able to show you they love you and care about you and want you. They may be having a bad day, they may be having a bad week. You should acknowledge that and understand that, but also know just because you understand where they are coming from and are okay with it that doesn't mean you can't feel a certain type of way.

It disappointing when the person you love and want and care for is making you feel unloved or unwanted or not cared for. Especially when you know they do in fact love, want and care about you. Having these doubts about them even when you know better may make you feel horrible and like a bad person for not trusting them, but that isn't the case. You aren't a bad person, You do trust them. You just don't feel how you should feel and that's completely okay.

It's okay to be hurt when they aren't in a good spot and you simply aren't the thing they need in that moment, It's okay to be hurt when they want some space away, It's okay to be hurt when they can't always show you the way they feel, It's okay to be hurt when you feel this way. It's perfectly normal.

But don't make yourself less than, Don't make yourself feel pathetic, Don't beg and plead for their attention. Give them their space and if they really love and care for you and you are who they want they will return. And if they don't remember, just because they don't want you doesn't mean someone else won't want you either.

You aren't pathetic, You aren't a bad person, You aren't ugly, You aren't impossible to love. You are glorious, You are amazing, You are beautiful, You are loved, You are wanted, You are desired, You are you- and I love you.