Disappear.

You never realized how something can disappear in an instant. One moment your happy life's grand and everything is perfectly as you knew it to be. Then you actually take a second to look around, take a moment to breathe, and you notice those who were there have vanished, the ones you loved are no longer there, everyone you had by your side now you have no one.

I try to my hardest to hold on to all my happy moments in fear of that one second they all disappear. But sometimes you don't hold on hard enough, sometimes you were never enough to begin with, sometimes no matter what you do you'll never be enough to keep them.

And its hard losing those happy moments, because here I am thinking of all the things I was excited to share with them, all the things I wanted to tell them, all the things I wanted to show them, all the things I wanted to do with them, all the things that now they'll never know, all the things we'll never experience now, everything I was looking forward to gone in an instant. To even think that I'll never see them again, I'll never talk to them again, I'll never be with them again, I'll never hear their voice again, I'll never say hello to them again- only that last final goodbye.

You can think what if I hadn't sent that message, what if I never did that one thing, what if I never acted that way, what if I felt something different, what if I was different. You can think that all you want, and trust me you will think that for such a long time, it'll never go away. But reality is, there was nothing you could've done.

You just weren't enough.

And you have to just accept that. Accept the fact that not everyone will like you or love you, not everyone will want you forever, not everyone will treat you nicely, not everyone will stay. Accept the fact that sometimes you have to say goodbye even when you don't want to.

Leave people in their peace if you clearly weren't the one giving it. Leave them when you're too much for them. Leave them when they don't feel the same for you anymore. Leave them when they're done.

Sometimes, you just have to accept them leaving, even if that's not what you want, even if it's hard and all you want is for them to give you a reason to hate them to make it easier, just accept it because sometimes your just not theirs.

But now, you can disappear.